Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Imagine


I watched this for 5 times when the first time I watched it. The title of this clip is imagine, yes I did imagine, but not my wedding. I just imagined how fun is to have a gf.

This is a true wedding anyway, you can create your own cinematic wedding film at here too http://www.papercranes.com.au/. This price is reasonable, if they can produce this kinda quality film. I'm still young, no need to bother it now. But for those who is getting marry can consider their service, you have to be at Australia I think.

Out of topic*

I have updated my blogroll, I only keep those blogs I actually visit, I know everyone of them of course. I noticed that Ms marple has started to blog already, she already got two posts on her new blog, Welcome! hahaha. (Mistake, I just know that Ms marple had already stop blogging, that post dated 1 year ago @@) And Himeko too, it's so nice to have your blog, wahahaha~

Damn...... sometimes I really hate to hang out with someone I don't feel fun or don't feel right, but I pity them so I always sacrifice myself. Like just now, I don't really like to talk to her, but she keeps want to hang out with me, so torturing... ARRRH...I hate that shit...

Wow, my mood change so quickly from hyped up to pissed.

The ultimate theory is coming, I will write it soon. Be ready, cause I'm gonna smack all ya pretty ass hard.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Losing

I have been traumatized this lately, dislike the feeling of losing.

But no choice, I guess I screwed up, because I asked her to move out with me. I didn't know that it's so matter to a girl to stay with a guy, I had stayed with a girls before at KL, it didn't seem to have any problem. Everybody is just doing their own thing, why it is so matter to a girl to stay with guy?

I asked her because she kept complaining about her current house, she said she wanted to move out to an apartment, coincidentally, I'm moving out too. I was stupid because I didn't see how it would be matter, I tried to convince her but overly did it. That's why I screwed, after this incident, I will never ask a girl to move out already.

She vaguely explained to me why a girl cannot stay with a guy, because they care how people would think of her, unless they are couple, if not, no discussion. So my understanding from her explaination is, they are concerned with their reputation, but how is that reputation matters at this age? (I mean this century, or this generation) I wouldn't think low of a person if she staying with a guy, if just two of them. As long they remain a clean and clear distance, there shouldn't be a problem. I assume she is right regardless of what I think, because I might not be completely understood yet, and I don't want to make another mistake.

I'm the only son in my family, I got 3 sisters. I'm used to tidiness and cleanliness. I remember when I was at kl, I once entered a guy only house, it was so damn messy, there were rubbish and dusty everywhere, the frigde got mould, the furniture I couldn't even dare to touch it. My friend proposed me to move in with them, I rejected. I knew it would be fun to live with guys because I occasionally went to their place to play game, but I didn't want to stay there.

After that, I found a good place to stay, but with girls. I never socialised with them, but I enjoy the clean and quiet environment.

You wouldn't know what kinda home I have, My own house's floor is mopped and wiped everyday, Not even a single day my house is never mopped and wiped. The floor is clean until when I walk I can make friction sound with my feet, it's like u touch a clean plate with your finger, I can even use the floor as my mirror. Not exaggerated. My toilets are cleaned everyday too, my bed sheet is changed every month or weeks, everything in my house is cleaned. So what kinda environment I'm living in makes what kinda person I'm.



This was me 1 year ago, shit picture I know, I look like girl I know, but I just want to show you my Actual Room. You can see everything is clean, even the wall also, must wipe. I saw the horror of guy's environment, I couldn't withstand a bit at all. They never clean anything, their bed, their table... It's like shit, I don't like it at all.

This one better. Also 1 year ago, nice morning I recall. I was skinny, but not now. =)

SO, I would prefer to stay with girl, BUT, if that girl also that dirty I would refuse without hesitation. Farking shit I would live in a dirty environment.

I wish she would know the reason why I asked her to move out and stay with me, I think she thinks I'm a pervert or something. Nah, the last thing I want is to have any indecency with her, somemore, it's 100% that I will not talk so much with her if we live together, because I'm always busy with something, I don't like to talk so much at home unless she is my family and BECAUSE to live with people who is not your family, it's good to ignore each other sometimes and talk lesser, don't like everytime also must talk. Talk only when we come out for drink or dinner, where the mood permits.

Her response is really nice, she would send me a cute smile but today, she didn't talk to me, I'm afraid that I might be losing, to someone I don't know. Hope she reads my blog, but how? I don't give her my link also. But still, AS USUAL, I would put an insurance on me, I'm not so crazy or on to her yet, it's ok to lose her although it sucks big time in my view, the insurance will cover when I lose her, I will feel there's nothing important also. The insurance is another theory itself, I will find an opportunity to discuss it next time if can.

One last thing, I don't care how my picture is, it's better you see me in person than looking at my picture. Mickey, I have been formulating the Ultimate Theory in my head, still trying to perfect it, because the next Theory I going to defeat, is the hardest of all! Will be posted here when I'm ready.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Commerce graduation

This is me 3 weeks ago, getting more and more recent liao my picture.

Today is the graduation day of Commerce student, I was again, hanging around at uni for study. Despite the fact that my campus is the largest in Australia, it was over crowded, cramped, hard to walk freely and get to a place.

Commerce student's graduation... it was the best!
Why? because it always has been, the most sight-worthy graduation of all faculties or disciplines. A lot a lot of leng lui dressed up nicely walking around everywhere, there were big eyes leng lui, cute leng lui, mature leng lui, any you can think of. They are either family or friends of the graduating student, who came from overseas to attend the graduation, if you saw Asian there are 92% probability she is an international student. The feeling was like Better than entering a beauty pageant contest as a guest, how to say... it was like each time you saw a beautiful girl, you get excited a bit, and before you actually calmed down or dissipated that feeling, you saw another beautiful girl again, it was like I kept being electrifed and really hyped up at that moment.

Hah, imagine how my graduation would be, sure very crappy, all westerners only! Sien... my course don't have many asian, mostly are locals. And I honestly think Chinese, Korean, or Japanese look better than westerner. So I'm not interest at them at all, I will lose appetite when think about their body, gosh they been eating Pizza, Mc Donald, Hamburger for life, what do you except? they are not like what you saw in TV. Only the guy look better, guy are handsome, but still if compares with us, I still prefer us! we got straight hair and balanced body, should be proud of it. And I think our look is more "tahan look" more than theirs.

The graduation day is again really an eyes opening experience, definitely Malaysia got a very limited choice. But I don't preclude the possibility that my country still got hidden gem somewhere. Now I think Hong Kong really got a lot of leng lui beside Taiwan, and of course china because it's vast. If you got watch 美女厨房 you sure know already.

Good night... I dont want to blog so late already next time.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

losing confident

Yea that's me, I was like WTF again. It was taken somewhere around 7 months ago. Again, I don't like the picture, just publish it for fun. I realised there are lots of picture of me haven't been published yet. Too lazy to bother.

Hope tomorrow I can see her again, she is like so high fashion sometimes I doubt I can keep up with her. Now I'm starting to care of what I should wear to go out because of her, if it wasn't her, I would wear very casual only.

Still think it's better not to think too much, just be myself.
Going to bed already, good night.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

It's me

That's me one year ago. Look so geli I just know. I was like WTF, this is me ar?

I know I'm contradicting myself sometimes, I said I don't need girl, but I'm doing the contrary right now.

Don't need girl doesn't mean I have to let my opportunity slip away, she has been giving me a lot of chances, and I do appreciate it. I genuinely meant it when I said I don't want to think about having a relationship right now, it took me about 3 weeks for me to get her number because I wasn't intended to do so. I only need to ask and I know she would give me. She just keeps on appearing in front of me, what can I do? It would be awkward if we continue to meet but never have the number of each other, it's like we are still not a formal friend yet. So I asked yesterday, after I asked, she took my phone and typed in her number and miscalled her phone instantly, how you interpret that? eagerness? or nervousness? I don't know exactly.

Sometimes it's vague and it's good in one perspective, because dream is always that vague before it came true.

I continue to meet her almost everyday, she talks with me a lot, we can talk about anything, and she always has the smile on her face. I do not hope much, I just hope we can continue like this everyday, talking and just talking happily.

At the moment, as long we maintain this kinda relationship, I'm content. Sometimes I just lose the ability to talk properly when I was with her, but she just didn't mind. She is just a simple girl, she is hardworking and have a great culinary skills, nah shouldn't say that, should say she cooks very well.

I lack one thing in my entire life, the stability of my mind. That is when you got a lot of ideas and thoughts and you cant seem to let it out or carry it out, it's torturing. Somebody like her would balance me out, I can put my ideas and thoughts on her, and she will be as simple as 1+1 =2, that is all I want.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Energy drinks

There's an energry drink which always freighten me, behold The Mother.

It's so scary even the font used for mother is so emo. It says twice the energy hit, I wonder if you drink it how would you be? no need to sleep for 48 hours. Despite how scary it's, it is sold everywhere in my uni, you can find Mother anywhere literally. I cant imagine anyone would buy Mother and drink it... sure ki siao after a can of mother.

I ran out of the library still hunted by the horror of The Mother, walked for a distance to search for the friendly neighbour drinks: redbull.

Doesn't look that scary as mother, the caffeine level is acceptable. But you wont find Redbull at anywhere as Mother, I wonder why. Redbull definitely my choice, but I don't drink energy drink that frequent, I had to have it because I couldn't focus on reading because of mild fatigue, and I didn't want to waste my time hanging around there for nothing.

If Mother is so successfully sold in Australia, Next time I will invent a new drink called The Terror, I will use very creppy font and put a picture depicting a student after drinking The Terror, can study whole night without a sleep at all, and got creppy fatigued panda eyes while still able to continue regardlessly.

Out of topic:
I successfuly gotten her number, nice, super leng lui wor, I think I don't need《放心追,宅男也能把到正妹》this book afterall. =)

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Otaku special

My friend have just brought a new book, the book title is《放心追,宅男也能把到正妹》.

That book is just what I need right now, too bad they don't sell it at Aus. Yesterday, I went to sing k with a bunch of friends, we got 正妹 among our group. And things were getting even better when we reach the location, because there were more and many many 正妹 and 辣妹, I just felt like in paradise. Australia sure got a lot of 正妹, I got a sudden impulse to stay at Australia and never go back. Comparing Malaysia and Australia, Malaysia really cant match at all, I guess you need to come here to comprehend what is international standard.

I was "shibai da~" (a failure) I couldn't even make a move to 正妹. There were several elements that were on play, ego, unwillingness to lower myself, and I don't want to turn it into an awkward situation if there's any chance. But we do talked a lot, we sat closely together too, that place was cramped and I could felt her body was lying on me. We maintained a friend relationship, but I want more, I want to talk something intimate with her, something realy makes her think that I'm onto her. Still, I played safe because talking with her like friend I could crack jokes and play game with her.

But still not enough, because I didn't make a single move, that doesn't count as a move, because I would do that to other person which I'm not interested with, It's my thing. Hence unsatisfied, need that book 《放心追,宅男也能把到正妹》.

One more thing, Guys, must be careful, very very careful. There was a girl yesterday, I could see her effort on making me drunk, she asked me to drink like 1000 times already, and she was drinking herself too. What was her intention? she ordered like 24 big bottles of beer at first and she asked me to drink. I'm not thinking too much here, she lives quite near to me, and as dumb as I could be, I can feel that she was having an affection on me.

Guys' rule number one when drinking: "never get drunk in front of the person you are not interested with" That's the rule my friends had been telling me since I first came Australia, Australia is totally different with Malaysia, If u get drunk in front of hungry and thirsty girl, the girl that you cant possibly like, there's no guarantee what can happen to you, it's so true that I had heard warning like this for many times already. Most likely they will grope or touch you one when you drunk, or purposely lie on your lap (I kena before). Because this country is inhabited by so many people from different country, you can meet any kind of people here.

I drank 2 bottles of beer and that was it, I remained sober and went back home safely.


An otaku would like this. *nodded. Meng pls enjoy slowly =) You can thank me later for introducing you this.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Car


Car... I keep thinking of it, because I just recieved a news from my parents. They told me they brought a new car, and IT WAS ONE MONTH AGO. Wow... and they just tell me now, even after that we had video chat for so many times within a month. Plus, I have been re-watching Initial D again, car is really what I'm thinking now.

I know their attitude of buying things, they brought me a brand new car when I was about to go kl for study, I told them I might need a car, then the next day they instantly brought one for me. I drove that car to kl several times, I hit full on the accelerator for 4 hours drive, travelling at 190 km per hour, and finally I damaged that car engine by driving recklessly and my dad sold it after 2-3 months of use. Nice.

And now that new car is for my little sista to commute from home to school. My sista is very lucky, I don't even got a chance to a drive car to school because I didn't have a license that time, no need to say to drive a New Car. Her friends don't even have a new car to drive, why my parent sold our car and brought her a new one, I don't get it. Should let her drive a crappy car instead! not that I don't love her, but that's how we are. I would buy her a nice car later if I can, but not when she still in high school~~!

My mom said she wanna buy New sport car, I said WHY? where got people buy NEW sport car one? all buy second hand or 3rd, 4th, 5th... 10th hand sport car. Because it's enough to give that impression, no need to spend so much, and nobody can tell the difference. I got a neighbour who owns 10-15 sport cars, TRUE, you can come I can show you. But they are all second hand at least, I know because he told us. I got another neighbour who lives within my Taman not far from my house got Red Hot Ferrari, he is a car distributor and seller. But that ferrari also second hand, even though it emits a loud bomb bomb sound when he hits his accelerator, still second hand means less than a million can buy already. We got 4 cars at the moment, all park inside our house, my house still can accomodate at least 5 more cars, the parking lot can put 3 , the garden can put 2 because got too many treesssss there, if remove those trees and landscape, can park 5 cars, hehe... greedy... I imagine only, don't have money to buy so many cars.

No need to buy anything la, wait me back first ok, I still got years at overseas.
Seriously, I'm lazy to take photo already. I finally found my resolution. My resolution is, I don't want to have any feeling and don't want to think about girl. It means I have to temporary put my feeling aside until I have acheived my goal. That also means not composing any song, because if I don't have the feeling of love or like or whatever you call, I can't make any song, it's like my source of inspiration, I don't have that I would only produre crappy song. Might be half a year I wont make any new song.

Initial D funny scene


What would you answer if a girl say to you "I don't want to go home today"? I heard that for at least 5 times already, and each time I answered differently. But, I have never said "let's go to a hotel". That words never came across my mind, but this fella had said it, while his buddies were eavesdropping him, haha so funny.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

宅男遇宅女

hahaha, I just came back from library, I was studying at there.

Guess what happened, I saw a girl watching Kang Xi Lai Le, it's a taiwan's variety show. I couldn't help but distracted, because I'm a person who watches variety shows a lot. I told my friend let's go back already, because my head wanna explode for reading too much. And my friend said we still got 25 mins before the bus came.

I said ok, then I was looking around see what I could do. I looked at that girl again, she was laughing while watching that variety show, so I couldn't help myself again but to bring a chair and sat beside her and watched together. I didn't know her at all, never met her in my entire life. She looked at me thrice, turned her head back and forward, I was thinking that she was curious about what the hell was I doing.

We continued watching the variety show, despite how weird it sounds, as we are completely stranger, it wasn't really that weird at that time. Out of the blue, miraculously, she gave me the other side of her earphone, so I can listen while watch with her together. I accepted it like it was a natural thing to do, I put on the earphone and we watched the variety show and laughed together.

Definitely, I think we got connection, it is like Otaku meets Otaku-chan. haha, quite fun. Before I left, she asked for my facebook and I gave her, I even introduced her to my favourite site: http://www.ykedwin.net the ultimate source of every Taiwan's variety shows.


It was raining the whole day today, until midnight, the rain had finally stopped. I went for the "midnight jogging" again, it has slowly becoming my routine.

I going to show what I usually bring with me when I'm at outside.

Front view
Side view

As you can see, It's usual. Today was raining, so I got my umbrella (high wind resistance). If for normal day, I would carry with me a bag (I got two, a backpack and a slide bag), a watch (alumnium), a phone (N95 8g nokia), Ipod Touch, wallet, and keys. Inside my bag got Macbook, books, bottle and pen.

That's all I carry to uni everyday. That backpack is special, it's limited edition of its kind, and I saw a lot of fake imitation of it already used by people. I got many shoes to change, got 7 pairs, 4 of them are nike (One Air), 1 sneaker, 1 full leather sandle, and 1 flip-flop.

SO, I'm not the conventional otaku ok? I live like an otaku, but doesn't really look like it. Don't misunderstood that I'm fragile, I always carry umbrella even when it's sunny day, and very obsolete in terms of fashion for at least 10 years.

It's essential to look cool all the time, still cannot be too over in look. Don't underestimate otaku, otaku got many types.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Library


For the first time I feel I look better with short hair. I look more with killing intent, and for some weird reason, I like it.


I spent my entire day at uni today, after class I went to the library to study. Exam is coming soon, I cant afford to waste my time anymore.

After that call from my dad, I'm quite concern with my past misdeed or misbehaviour would burden my dad. I'm not concern with that car at all, my dad can settle that easily I know. I just want my dad to know, I'm not that kind of person anymore.

I always in control when I am driving, I never lose a bit. But driving like that would intimidate people, even though it's prefectly normal for myself. Hence I wont do that anymore, but it wont stop me from driving fast.

My high viligance ability has its root, I'm about to tell something that only my close friends would know. I had a "thrid eye", I could see things that aren't there. When I was small, I always cry, I was a crybaby. I cried because I saw things that I didn't want, I could sense thing too. In fact if you touch me with one finger when I was asleep, I would wake up instantly knowing that you touched me. Beside that, at first I would wake up with only one alarm beep, and fast enough to stop the alarm before it beeps the second time. Later, I would wake up just before the first alarm beeps. It happened always.

During my primary school, I used to have my eyes glimpsed around over things, it appeared anytime and anywhere. Up until high school, I met some friends who shared the same ability with me, but they weren't that sensitive as me. It was before I graduated, I prayed to God asked him to close that thrid eye of me, and since then I cant see anything already. I'm not a superstitious person, it's your choice to believe it or not. It might sounds eerrie but I think nobody would read it because I have been throwing out a lot of words this lately, nobody would bother to read it all.

As a result, I developed a swift response to anything. I can respond to people mistake in less than 1 second and give a horn to that person. I can avoid collision with just a few cm, I didn't know that but my friend was on the passenger seat told me so.

So I can drive pretty decently, even though I committed those offences, I did it on intentionally. Hope my dad would forgive me.

Price pay

[a story which has been told by someone, it's not a confession of a crime, but rather it's a reflection of conscience of someone's guilt. It's not an evidence of a crime, but rather it's a story of a person who commits a crime, and still not a confession of a crime of anybody.]

3 years ago, I did something really bad. I was raged with hormones, bold in a stupid way, and naive.

I had a car race with police, it happened like this. I was sending my sister to sport day, that time I was eager to drive, I was dying to drive a car already, but I didn't have a license yet. I got a L license which is still not a legitimate car license yet, it's only for learning how to car, not to drive. I drove with my mini cooper that I got for christmas. Without wearing any seat belt, I thought I was competent enough to drive and the ego had made me think that I can do anything that I want.

After sending my sister, I was on my way back. There was a turning point which I couldn't see the other side until I made that turn, and it was right after that turn, a road check by police was held. I didn't have my seat belt on, and I was too late to put it on. I had no license, no money to bribe, no IC, was not wearing seat belt, and finally I added another crime to my already committed crimes - I bolted away from the police. It was a result of tremendous stress and the desire to get that full car license before it was nullified by my actions.

I hit full on the accelerator, and I wasn't looking back. Until a moment, I looked at the rear mirror, I was glad I ditched the cops and slowed down. But not true, it was later they caught up with me, and asked me to stop. They drove a 1000cc motorbike, I should not underestimated them.

I was caught and I had nothing to give them, they were about to drag me to the police station, but I did something that all Malaysian would do, bribe the cop. But I didn't have any money, I told them I would go home and bring some for them, at least 100 hundreds buck. They "snatched" my car key, eventually I managed to persuade them to allow me to go home and bring some real cash for them. The police gave me back my key, without the remote control, but I told them without it I couldn't open my car because it constantly automatic lock itself. And they gave me everything, and I took off.

I went back home, and I was about to gather the money for them. I called my dad, he's my savior, I told him everything that had happened, and asked him what's my liability? he said, that police was dumb to let me go, and I could escaped for nothing because of that. There was no liability on part of me, my dad said. He's a lawyer, and a former chief inspector.

I told this story before, and I'm repeating this so that you would understand the background. Today it maybe is the time that I have to pay the price of my wicked, and morally wrongdoing action. I dad called me and asked me just now, he asked did I was caught by any JPJ before? (Jabatan pengangkutan Jalan raya? the department of transport I guess) I said no, the police were traffic police, they were not JPJ officer. He said the mini cooper had been blacklisted by the JPJ.

I replied my dad was it because I ran off the police and I was blacklisted? he said no, It hasn't got anything to do with JPJ. I replied, Oh.

It wasn't the only time I committed statutory offense of this kind before, I was caught by police when driving the same mini cooper while using a phone, and my dad was at the scene, he came to rescue me with his influence. I was driving recklessly at Penang with mini cooper, I almost hit a person at the traffic light when I suddenly made a turn, the biker almost fell off his bike, luckily he was able to recover. It wasn't because my skill are bad, but that biker was frighten when I did that stunt, I was constantly watching him when I did that. Another one, I drove passing two car between or beside them at two lane course, with high speed, they didn't even notice. I play chase and run at highway with some guy at night I didn't know. 

I did a lot of bad things, and that all combined gives me an experience that I will never forget. It made me the kind of driver that drives the most safely. For the record, I never had any accident before, not even a single one after I did all those stunt, I even drifted too. 

I was able to achieve the kind of relaxation that abled me to drive that seemed recklessly to people, but not for me, I thought that was the way of getting home quick. 

Everything has a price to pay, you wont get it not, but you will get it later. Everything has its consequences, do never think that you can escape without any liability. I will one day become the enforcer of law, like my dad, it doesn't allow me to break the law because I can do it because I'm familiar with it, and because I got influence. Dad knew that I was naive, he tried to give me a chance, or else it could be too traumatized for me if I was caught by police and license revoked, he knew I love driving, he knew it could break my heart if I couldn't drive again. He made me realized one thing that I will remember it forever as to never to commit a crime and think you can escape with it. 

Dad is the man, the man of his institution. And I learned something from him, that everything has it's price. IF you hit a man, one day you might be hit by a truck or step on a shit or something. Or maybe you might need to pay the price at your afterlife. It seems that dad is going to cover my ass again this time, to un-blacklist my car, he didn't blame me or say anything just now. And I guess I know his intention.

PS: I don't have time to proofread this, please excuse me if there's any error on the text.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Someone

I'm sorry for someone, I did bad thing because I wasn't genuinely meant everything I said, I was playful, I was craving for something I don't have, and I was obscured by emotion. After I ignored her for 1 week, I got better mind now and know I was stupid. I guess I was just too emotionally attached with her because we talked a lot. When you talk with someone too much and too often, the more you open your heart, the more it will comes a false feeling that you think you like her. I had suspected so, I stopped talking with her, looked back at her pictures and thought for a while, and I got the answer. It was a false feeling because that feeling ended only 2 days after we didn't talk. I realised we shared a lot of things, but it doesn't mean we are to be together, our emotional dependent was too great.

I know the person who destined for me, should be someone I would never need to think about that I need to be her, someone that I would be attracted to her in everyway and everything, and I would make her love me so badly that she will never leave me.

You are my emotional support all the time, and I thank you for everything you shared with me. Now I don't need it anymore, I don't need someone to think of when I'm alone like I told you before. I'm different already.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

A bad dream

This will be the last picture of me I put here, until I found my resolution.

I was running alone at night again just now, before I spoke with Ruby. The ouside was cold and windy, but I ran like nothing was holding me back. I listened to this song, A Bad Dream, over and over again with my Ipod touch, until I finally needed to sit down and rest to catch my breath, and where I sat I was looking at the big lake in front of me, under a lamp post.

I realised no one was in my mind. I have been alone for years, I generally closed my door to anyone even though I did open it once (in a blue moon), but eventually no one came in. It was then, I was thinking am I begin to have no feeling for anyone anymore, because I'm content. I might love only myself but no one, I don't want to have that kinda feeling, guess that explains why I keep taking photo of me, so I wont take photo anymore, until I grown back my hair or found my resolution.

I rejected a lot of people, I was too high demanding, and finally I'm alone. Sometimes I feel like somebody's soul is calling for me, I just don't know who. It screams sometimes, like that person is just like me out there, alone, frustrated. Is that why I was rejecting people all along? because it weren't they who made the call, that I had to answer.

I have to run again, I want to find my answer. It is not important, but it keeps me sane for living a lonely life, because I know there are still years to come. I finished running the largest campus in Australia, how far will I go?

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Miss something I lost


I gained a lot of compliments for cutting a short hair, Why I never got people compliment me when I got long hair? My sis said I looked a bit like girl when I got long hair, What the hell? She said luckily I got big body and therefore still ok. What's up with the Japanese hair style?! I'm just following the Japanese, my friend said "yah, that's why japanese hair looks so girly". = = Dude I don't wanna convince anyone already, wonder everyone got see Final Fantasy one or not, the male character always got long hair, and my hair is just about that long only, not like very long and disgusting. At least I must got long side-hair (I'm not sure sideburns is the word for it, because sideburns kinda like beard, not hair), and the fringe must be long enough also.

Got long hair means you can tide up with headband, it always looks nice. I always wear it when I go gym, study, or play basketball. I got 5 headbands, now I have to wait until my hair grow back to wear it already. With long hair I can make a lot of style too, I can use wax to make a messy look or straighten it for a tidy look. Long hair always looks nicer than short hair, the only problem is it's not wind proof.

That picture was taken 2 months ago, I had published others similar one before but not this one. I'll brand my picture if not too much work for me to do so, everyone seems to do it, and I always use photoshop to resize the picture, convenient. If too many pictures to upload, I wont brand it. I'm lazy even to resize my picture, let alone to brand it. Photoshop takes time to load, it will be better if I can resize the picture in other way. A lot of people like to blur their picture with PS, but for me I like it clear, so I only use it to adjust the brightness of the picture. You just need a good lighting condition to snap photo, then it should be fine already, dont rely on PS too much, and I sometimes feel headache to watch blurred or faded picture.

To aiikiko, I'm not Japanese, I'm Malaysian chinese. It's embarrassing to say this, but I donno got how many percent korean, maybe 5%? I got korean ancestry, I have confirmed it from my grandparents and my dad told me Ah zhoh(my grandfather mom) said so, not sure it's true thou, because no evidence so I never tell anyone also except few, because they are not interested. Korean are ugly, I'm not racist, but they are the most plastic surgery done people in this planet, I draw my conclusion based on fact. My Ex is a korean gal, she said she only liked me because I dont look like local chinese boy. I think that's crap, if my friends are reading this they surely laugh.

I think I'll be less updating my blog, exam is coming. Summer is coming too, I can feel the temperature raising quick. The bad news is I wont be going back to malaysia for this coming holiday, the good news is I might get a trip to Taiwan if I score well in this coming exam, I must score well, because I want to know some Taiwanese Mei mei, like this one in this stupid online game ads.





杀很大is now use to describe big boobs anyway, or something extreme. I know yao yao from 黄金计程车, this term was originated from there. 宅男杀手瑤瑤, as a 宅男, ya she kills me, therefore I must go Taiwan.


不错不错, not bad not bad. Save mei mei, kill white face wanker, free to pay. Very persuasive. I just put this just to show how stupid it is, I dont like it at all.

Friday, September 11, 2009

The new haircut

My friends have introduced me to a hairdresser, which according to them, is very beautiful and very good on cutting. Today, I decided to pay her a visit. I ditched the Japanese lady that I promised her to go grocery together, hopped up a bus and went there.

There are two salons, the new branch which is bigger is at downstair, and the main one is at upstair and somewhere away from the branch one. I always go the branch one, not the main. The saloon name is Aqua.

It was the first time I went to the main one. It was small but comfortable and cozy and they got a really nice interior design that I was impressed. When I got up there, I saw the hairdresser, I was like "OMG, she is hot". You know Ayumi? she is Ayumi hot. I was thinking, she must be the shampoo girl, but she is not! She is the hairdresser. (In Malaysia, they usually hire useless but pretty shampoo girl.) She looks even prettier x10000 times than any shampoo girl that I have met.

I had an eye contact with her since I walked in that salon and never stopped, and she was looking back at me with her innocent way. I didnt know why we would have eye contact for so long, she just kept looking at me and I was attracted with her eyes.

I sat down and let her do whatever she liked to my hair. I became so unreasonable as to making a decision, she asked me "do you wanna cut here short? I think it will be nice =)", I just answered "yes, yes~ =D" And then, GOODBYE to my long hair~~!! T.T...

I wanted to keep my hair long, but she insisted that I cut it short. I did tell her what hairstyle I want, but she got the mind of her own, she thought I should have a short hair. WHY IS EVERY GIRL I MET WAN ME TO HAVE A SHORT HAIR? I dont get it. Whilst, male hairdresser would advise me to keep my hair length at certain point. I have become so unreasonable because she is very attractive and beautiful, she is tall enough, and her eyes are emitting electric field everywhere, as to now I dont feel regret that I have my hair cut, I dont have any disappointment at all, I just feel happy that she cut my hair. =) Even that I want to keep my hair long, it doesnt matter because it will grow back anyway.

I dont think short hair is nice, but I think she likes it. = = She was like didnt care of my opinion anymore, I said "I want to keep the length", she said "I cut here short, it's nice =)" What the hell, Typical korean girl, like my Ex. They are like "because they are pretty they can do whatever they want" like that. Damn geram...

Now I think there are certain topics that I cant publish here anymore. As I'm getting more people to come here, I must restrain myself the desire to speak freely on any topic. Honestly, I dont feel comfortable anymore when people from my previous blog are coming back here, I thought I dumped that blog life, but it seems to come back.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Otaku

He has been reading a lot, like hell.

He is damn bored, and loses his grip.

Takes off his spect.

Wonders what he could do.

Nothing.

Maybe not.

He could go check on fb and give some stupid comment.

Sien, no status for him to comment.

What's this? he says

Tag me again I hamtam you!

ahh, leng lui~

CB, he remembers he still got one assignment, He damn stress. Close fb lo.

The end.

Monday, September 7, 2009

Assignment done

Tired, Blurred. I finally finished the law assignment which is 2545 words (not including footnote, if included it will be 3200, got 40+ footnotes.). I start wondering why people would feel tortured with only 1500 words of assignment, if it's just 1500 words, I would finish it in one or two days. Because of the 1000 words difference, the impact was totally different.

I took 1 week to finish it because of the abounding research I had to do. I read more than I wrote, sometimes it could be 2 hours for only 1 sentence.

I drank a tea, hit the road until I saw the sunrise, you know what I mean. My eyes are so sore now, cant even focus right to see. I have to use spectacle to ease up a bit, if not I really wont bother to see anything, because my eyesight is already bad even though I dont wear spect that much.


I really like this vid, it's from Asian Kung Fu Generation, the song is Kaigan Doori. But this is the concert version, they use violin in that background music, it's totally different than MP3 one. I reckon that MP3 one is better. It's on the top 10 song in my Ipod Touch =D

They are initially a bunch of nerds who met up in a music bar or whatsoever before they formed a band together, I dont remember clearly. I'm a nerd as well, I spent years "in house" practising mucis, and now what I'm doing? : Nothing related to music (beside composing song, which doesn't require any practise at all). How envy I am for them, if you really never hear of Asian Kung Fu Generation doesn't mean they are not famous, they are pretty famous in Japan, just you never pay attention to them.

I once listed out how many music instruments I knew and good at, there were 9 including chinese instruments. Now, my skill rust already, I only dare to say I still play fairly well piano and violin only.

At least I surely can play piano blindfolded, I always do that as I sort of head down and play without looking at any key. And I never use any music sheet for play, I can play with both hand after I listened to any song. If you ask me why my head is down when I play piano, it's a habit I acquired after playing for hours and hours everyday. Not just that, I sort of sleep when I play piano, that's why I look down. I know it sounds absurd but it's real, I have a "sleep disease" which I talked about before.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Assignment break time

I think I prefer to host my picture at imageshack.com. Btw, this is how I look like when it's taken from far. (I always take close picture, if you haven't noticed.)

This is how I look like when you saw my eye. (Truely, I always bent my body to self-picture myself)

I'm doing my assignment right now, break time over, back to work.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

I'm not a composer


I wrote this song about 6 months ago and gave it to my friend asked him to fill in the lyrics. Out of my expectation, beside filling in the lyrics he found a singer and asked her to sing the song. Anyway, I was happy to hear a MP3 version of my song =)

I orginally named it 邂逅, I put it at the right hand bar there if you wanna listen to the solely musical one you can check it out. I'm not going to link it here because geocities is closing down, the link will be changed again.

But he named it 方向, it was ok for me I dont mind. I been keeping this song for 6 months and never uploaded or posted it, last 2 weeks I formatted my laptop and I had lost it. I asked my friend to send it again to me, luckily he is keeping it. So, I better post it just in case I lost it again for any reason.

Sunny day


I'm back, finally I can webcam freely as I wanted. (That first picture looks stupid, anyway, this is my blog I don't care)

The new version of msn is not compatible with my webcam, hence I stopped webcam with anyone since then except with my family. Luckily Skype works well with my webcam. So the webcam king is back for a while, hahaha. But seriously, no more already. I'm already 21, playing with webcam is no longer my interest. That time is over.

I lost my key today, I just realised it when I reached home with my friend. And I ran back to uni to find it, found it at the place where I sat 6 hours ago in the lecture hall. It was quite lucky because nobody actually found it and handed it over to lost and found, if anyone did, I could have no key today because the lost and found department closed at 5 p.m. I could have lost $100 (RM300) if I really lost my key. I'm not clumsy, I dropped my key because of my loss pocket. It only happens like once in every 20 years or so, I never lost my key anyway.

Did a lot of cardio than usual at gym, trying to get as near as possible to 0% fat. But then I notice that my muscle is getting smaller, am I doing the right way? My weight is still at constant 72kg, probably the fat is converting to muscle now, that explains why. Hmmm, clear the fat even though I'm not fat then build basic muscle... I'm applying all the "fitness theories" my friend told me, still on the way to perfect my body. I'm now 181cm tall, 72kg.

I've lost someone important because of my ego, I hope she will accepts me... however less the chance is, I'll stand at under 晴天, and wait for her.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Busy

Study, assignment, and tutorial. All have taken a toll on me.

I wish I got more free time to sleep, huh... why am I saying that? Is my old illness back again? Yes I have been feeling tired all the time, my sleepy-illness is back. It's a hereditary diesease, my dad told me already (he got it too). It's likely nothing can cure it permanently, I have to take care one part of my organ which supposedly the root of the problem, my intestine.

My dad told me I cant eat spicy and/or sour food, taking those food will make me really tired and unable to focus. It's a real illness and possibly rare one. So think, what have I been taking this lately... Seasoned sour tuna fish! Damn it, no wonder I began to feel sleepy this lately. I feel like I just wanna hug my pilow and sleep deeply and soundly. I think garlic is the problem as well, not just spicy and sour things. I use quite a lot of garlic than usual in my cooking, guess I have to cut that as well.

I guess any food that is having an affect at intestine will make me feels tired and weary. Wonder how my dad dealt with that problem, he said he been taking medicine for intestine for years to recover but no permanent cure. Will that help me?

Gosh, I been sleeping at lectures. Couldn't help it.