Sunday, October 18, 2009

The old light

It was 4 years ago, that time I was form 5.

The days were glory, I had a status that allowed me to go anywhere at my school. I exploited that privilege, with good reason. I often skipped class or disappeared during recess, there was only one place that I would go, it was the hall.

The hall was boring, huge, and empty. Warm lights shone in that hall through the high window, the doors were locked, shades at the floor, and it was dim actually, but rather bright at the top. I stepped in that hall, I switched on that switch, plugged in that cord. And I played.

It all suits well, I was thinking. I was playing chopin, and the warmth of light enlivened me, and the piano. It was all that I needed.

I often sneaked in part of building with my friend, playing piano. I even taught him how to play, and he played before the girl of whom he liked. I wondered why, it was I who possessed the skills and privilege, but I never did what he do, instead I had given him the opportunity to confess to girl, while I was still playing in the dark and dim places alone mostly.

Same thing happened at Taylor College, I sneaked in that empty hall, it was more grand than my high school one, but it had no sunlight.

I have lost my source of inspiration, I didn't talk to a girl for so long already. I have to confess my source of inspiration is the relationship I have with someone. Once I have that relationship, that inspiration is endless. I cant write any song now. Seriously, I cant. There's just nothing for me to write already.

I have stopped talking to someone I always talked to, and as a result, lost my inspiration. I just wish I could go back to my old school, at that old piano and light, and play this piece of chopin, I might gain another perspective of music, and myself. That old light that shone at that hall, I miss that moment.

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