A bad dream

This will be the last picture of me I put here, until I found my resolution.

I was running alone at night again just now, before I spoke with Ruby. The ouside was cold and windy, but I ran like nothing was holding me back. I listened to this song, A Bad Dream, over and over again with my Ipod touch, until I finally needed to sit down and rest to catch my breath, and where I sat I was looking at the big lake in front of me, under a lamp post.

I realised no one was in my mind. I have been alone for years, I generally closed my door to anyone even though I did open it once (in a blue moon), but eventually no one came in. It was then, I was thinking am I begin to have no feeling for anyone anymore, because I'm content. I might love only myself but no one, I don't want to have that kinda feeling, guess that explains why I keep taking photo of me, so I wont take photo anymore, until I grown back my hair or found my resolution.

I rejected a lot of people, I was too high demanding, and finally I'm alone. Sometimes I feel like somebody's soul is calling for me, I just don't know who. It screams sometimes, like that person is just like me out there, alone, frustrated. Is that why I was rejecting people all along? because it weren't they who made the call, that I had to answer.

I have to run again, I want to find my answer. It is not important, but it keeps me sane for living a lonely life, because I know there are still years to come. I finished running the largest campus in Australia, how far will I go?